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Title: The Shortest Ever Re-write of Season Nine (Other than denying the whole thing ever happened) Summary: Changing just one line would give the whole season a different feel. Author's notes: I've taken the dialogue from the "Inside the X" transcript as I've only seen NIHT once and didn't feel the need to torture myself again by watching it just to write this. And it isn't actually that short. I kinda got carried away a little. Oh well. "I've been looking for Mulder," Doggett said in a panic. "I went to his Apartment." "I know," Scully replied, refusing to look at him. "Where'd he go?" Doggett insisted, living up to his name by refusing to let go of the verbal bone. "Dana - where'd he go?" "He's gone," Scully said wincing at the unfamiliar use of her first name. "We're out of milk and William needed more diapers. He'll be back in a few minutes and then I'm sure he'll be happy to help you out. We both will actually seeing as how I'm a professionally trained FBI Agent who's brain has not turned to mush just because she's had a baby." "Oh good," Doggett replied letting out a sigh of relief. "Cause there's something really weird going out about Knowle Rohrer." "We"re actually a bit busy today though," Scully went on, ignoring him. "Mulder moved the last of his stuff in this morning - you should have seen all the suitcases he had! He tripped over one of them coming out of the shower and introduced William to some rather choice language that I'd have preferred for him not to have learned until at least pre-school. We've put most of Mulder's furniture into storage for now until we can get a bigger place with room for his beloved coach which I always used to hate but it does have a special meaning now due to this one night about nine months ago when - " She trailed off upon seeing Doggett's face turn an unnatural shade of red. "Well. Anyway. Mulder and I are determined to keep our son safe and we figure the best way to do that is to carry on working on the X-Files but on a part-time consultant basis seeing as how we've got a son to raise and a LOT of sex to catch up on after the whole abduction-resurrection-grumpy nonsense that went on last year. But in-between breast feeding my son and jumping my lover's bones - I'll be happy to do the odd autopsy or two. And I'm sure Mulder can fit in some profiling and/or mutant hunting when he's not reading William bedtime stories and making me a very happy woman in the bedroom department. Are you okay Agent Doggett? You"re looking rather ill." "Umm. Yeah. Umm. I gotta go. I'll call you if anything comes up," he stuttered, already backing out of the door. "You do that. Oh look. Here's Mulder now. Are you sure you don't want to ask him anything?" "Hey Scully!" Mulder called out cheerfully, coming down the hall with a bulging grocery bag. "I got some more whipped cream for you as it was on special offer and I know how much you liked it last time we - Oh, hi Agent Doggett. I didn't see you there." "Agent. Umm. Mulder. I was umm. Just going. See you around. Sometime. Maybe." "Sure thing Agent Doggett," Mulder replied casually leaning in to give Scully a kiss. "But you know what? Maybe you better give it a few weeks. Scully and I have rather a lot of catching up to do. Know what I mean?" Doggett made a quick escape down the hallway. Scully considered scolding Mulder for his immature behavior but then she remembered the whipped cream and decided to forgive him. Written because Vickie Moseley asked me to! Feedback is worth more than gold. Make me rich! dreamscatcher@wildmail.com
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