Title: Heartsong: I Don't Want to Miss a Thing
Author: Julie L. Jekel
Disclaimer: They're not mine...if they were, this wouldn't be AU. ;-)
Spoilers: Up through "Per Manum"
Feedback: Please! drjekel@hotmail.com or azarsuerte@hotmail.com. Flames will be read with amusement by the SHODDS mailing list. g
Category: VR
Dedication: To SHODDS--my refuge in uncertain times. ;-)
Acknowledgments: To coolbyrne, for not minding that I subconsciously swiped Caitlin's name from her story, "Get Ready." g
Keywords: DSR. Meaning Doggett/Scully romance. If you don't like that, I recommend you save yourself a lot of anguish by NOT reading this fic, or any others in the series. :-) As my friend jeri says, "the delete key is your friend." ;-)
Set in an alternate universe that diverts from canon (obviously g) just before "This is Not Happening."

Note: "Heartsong: The Best of Friends," for anyone who hasn't read it, is available at the XFMU archive--http://www.geocities.com/xfmu_jdmrfic/.

Summary: Prequel to "Heartsong: The Best of Friends." John Doggett watches his wife and stepdaughter sleep.


Had it really been more than five years ago that they met?

With that wondering thought in mind, he rolled over to silently watch the two women beside him. Five-year-old Caitlin was sound asleep, one arm curled around the stuffed fox her biological father had given her two birthdays ago. Dark auburn curls caressed her little face, falling over closed hazel eyes. She'd crawled into bed with them at the height of the storm's fury and he'd fallen asleep with one arm curled possessively around her tiny form.

The same hand that had held her as if she were his now reached down to trace the line of her face. She was a precious possession all right, even if she was only his on paper...and in his heart.

On the other side of the little girl, her mother shivered, a low sigh escaping her lips. His attention was instantly riveted. They'd experienced more than their share of nightmares in the past five years, and her for many years before that. Every time she cried out in her sleep, the same iron gauntlet tightened around his heart that had the first time he'd been witness to those nightmares. The first time he'd been privileged to watch her sleep.

That privilege had never ceased to awe him.

Wary eyes searched her face for some sign that he should wake her, but the brows were creased more in what seemed like frustration than fear. A smile touched his lips. That look was one he was more than familiar with. It was the first expression he'd ever seen on her face, and there was a time when he'd never dreamed of seeing anything else there. Certainly not the look of absolute adoration that sometimes filled her incredible blue eyes.

He'd never dreamed she could feel that way towards him.

Sleep tugged at the back of his mind, reminding him of the long day that awaited when the sun rose. But something held him back. This was a rare, priceless moment. For in some ways, only when asleep were the two loves of his life wholly his.

Eyes drifted back to Caitlin, that precious borrowed child he'd come to love as his own. Recently they'd begun trying to conceive a child, but so far every attempt had ended in disappointment. Sometimes it hurt, the possibility that they would never have a little one they had created together, but he wouldn't give up Caitlin for the world, even if it meant having to share her. Both of them had lost a child before they ever met--nothing could make them take for granted the miracle they had, not even the countless failures to give that miracle a brother or sister of their love. Caitlin just reveled in the siblings her other family had given her, her generous heart too young to understand.

"Shouldn't you be asleep?" a drowsy, throaty voice teased his ear from across the bed.

He looked up and into his wife's eyes, a tender smile meeting the one that hovered on her tired lips. Her hand, which lay next to his across her daughter's side, shifted to capture his fingers.

"I will," he promised, keeping his own voice quiet so as not to wake Caitlin. "I just wanted to watch my girls for a minute."

She chuckled and his smile warmed in gratitude. "Go to sleep, John," was her amused but firm command.

He grinned. "Yes, ma'am."

With one last bemused look, her eyes drifted closed once again.

Leaning carefully over, he pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. "G'night, Dana."

Fin

"I Don't Want to Miss a Thing"
by Aerosmith

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Every moment I spend with you is a moment I treasure

Don't want to close my eyes
Don't want to fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you baby
And I don't want to miss a thing

Laying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes
And thank God we're together
I just want to stay with you in this moment forever
Forever and ever

Don't want to close my eyes
Don't want to fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you baby
And I don't want to miss a thing

I don't want to miss one smile
I don't want to miss one kiss
I just want to be with you
Right here with you just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And stay here in this moment
for all the rest of time
Baby, baby

Don't want to close my eyes
Don't want to fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you baby
And I don't want to miss a thing

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