Title: The Monstrous Question
Author: Egyptian Princess of 1290 bc
Authorlink: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/673819/
Category: X-Files
Genre: Family/Humor
Rating: T
Disclaimer: I Don't own the X-Files.

Summary: Fifth in Monster Series. William asks the question all parents fear shortly after catching them in a compromising position.

William woke earlier than usual that morning; he lightly stirred in his bed before finally giving up on sleep. As his feet gently hit the cold hardwood floor, his eyes peaked at his UFO alarm clock his father had given him; it read five o' six in light green digital writing. He lightly scratched his head confused as to what had awakened him so early.

He was about to crawl back under his covers and try sleep again when a noise sounded from above his head. As he looked up, curiosity hit him and he began to ponder what was going on upstairs in his parent's bedroom. As he reached his door, hand on the handle he heard a female scream, once again, the noise came from above him. With that noise ringing in his ears, William quickly exited his room and made his way upstairs.

As he walked down the darkened hall towards his parent's bedroom, he began to listen to other noises escaping the room, small moans and incoherent whispered words. As he finally reached the door, he gently pushed it open and took in a deep breath before peaking in. His heart was pounding in his chest and his small form was shaking as he forced his head through the small empty space and gazed into his parent's room.

What he saw confused him, from atop his parent's bed lay his mom and dad, his father had his mother pushed down on several pillows and was laying on top of her, from what he could tell admits the thrown clothes and messy sheets, both parents were naked. Scully had her chest pressed against Mulder's as she gently kissed his lips and her bare hips were covered by Mulder's leaving everything to the imagination. That is if you had one, and at eight and a half years old, little William didn't, at least not for that use.

"Mommy? Daddy?" he asked, pulling their attention on him. Before William even had a chance to blink, Mulder climbed off of Scully and they were quickly grasping on to the blankets desperate to cover themselves.

"Hey Buddy." Mulder tried to remain cool as Scully looked to her son, a look that only deer's got when caught in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle.

"What are you doing?" he asked curiously looking to both of his parents.

"Wrestling," Mulder spat out as quickly as possible. Scully gave him a questionable look.

'Wrestling?' She mouthed, Mulder only shrugged.

"With your clothes off?" William asked a bit skeptical. Mulder silently cursed how he took after his mother.

"Its how mommy's and daddy's wrestle," he thought up quickly. Again Scully gave him the look again.

"Oh, ok," he said looking at them oddly, not believing it fully, but sensing how uncomfortable his parents were he didn't pry.

"Something wake you up, Sweetheart?" Scully asked, pulling her gaze from Mulder to her son.

"You woke me up."

Both Mulder and Scully lowered their heads embarrassed, of nothing their son understood and everything they were getting caught for.

"Sorry Buddy, we'll be quieter," Mulder said as William closed the door and left.

"Wrestling? Mulder, really?" she asked lightly jabbing him in the ribs.

"I didn't know what else to say. I panicked. You weren't offering up suggestions at the time."

"I don't think he's ready to know about…" She trailed off.

"The birds and the bees?"

"And the Monkey Babies," she said smiling up at him, Scully was once again resting on her back and Mulder was hovering over her.

"When do you think we should tell him?" Mulder asked.

"I don't know, that's the first step in growing up and…I don't know if I'm ready for that."

"We can't keep him a kid forever."

"I know, I just wish we could," she said softly as Mulder began kissing her neck. "Mulder…how can you still be thinking that after what just happened?"

"For one, we never solved my problem," he said pushing his hips against her leg to make his point clear. "Second, he's probably gone back to bed…all we have to do is be a little quieter."

"What if he comes back up?"

"He knows we're 'wrestling'. Besides he looked tired."

"God, why do I give into you?" she asked pulling him back on top of her, a giant smile rested on her face. "From now on, we lock the door."

"Deal," he said kissing her lips.

The rest of the day went on as normal; William seemed unfazed by what had happened earlier that morning and ate his breakfast as if nothing were out of the ordinary. He went on to tell his mom and dad about a dream he had had the previous night, going back and changing the story here and there once realizing how ridiculous it sounded. Mulder and Scully laughed and it seemed all had been forgotten.

"Mommy? Can I play with Lila?" came his loud scream later that day. Scully looked to the front door where William stood next to his father. Scully had been in the kitchen cleaning up and washing dishes. It was already mid noon and as Scully made her way to her son, she smiled as she made eye contact with her best friend and coworker.

"Sure, pumpkin, go ahead," she said and watched as both kids headed for his room a few feet away and slammed the door. Mulder smiled to himself shaking his head and made his way back upstairs to finish the cleaning he had been doing.

"Hey, to what do I owe this surprise?" Scully asked taking her friends coat.

"Oh, Kyle is out for the day and Lila wanted to play with Will. Sorry if it's an intrusion," Amy said following Scully into the kitchen.

"No, not at all. Actually I need Will to get his mind off of something and a friend seems like just the thing," Scully said boiling some water for tea.

"What's up?" Amy asked looking to her friend curiously. Scully began to describe the morning's previous events to her.


"Will?" Lila asked softly looking over to her friend who was pulling out his Hotwheels to play with.

"Yeah Lila?" he asked looking over to her.

"Do you know where babies come from?" she asked looking to him lost.

"No, why?"

"My mommy says she's having a baby, and I want to know where they come from."

"Did you ask her?"

"Not yet, I wanted to see if you knew. You're smart," she said smiling.

"Not that smart," he said smiling back.

"No way, he caught you and Mulder doing the nasty?" Amy all but laughed.

"Well according to Mulder we were 'wrestling'," Scully said laughing as she took a sip of her tea.

"I'm sorry Dana, but that is too funny." Both women laughed.

"I'm just afraid of the day we have to tell him the truth."

"Yeah, that day is coming quick for Lila."

"Why's that?"

"Well…" She trailed off and placed a hand over her flat stomach.

"Oh my God! Really?" Amy nodded smiling. "Congratulations."

"Thanks," she said hugging Scully. Scully could feel a small sadness in her, knowing having another child wasn't even an option for her, her fate was sealed on that one. Yet she still put on a happy face for her friend and hugged her tightly.

"How far along are you?" She questioned not showing any signs of emotional injury.

"Three months. I told John last week and we told Lila yesterday. I fear that question is in her mind and she wants it answered."

"Yeah, and as sad as it is, they are almost to the age where we can't lie anymore."

"Exactly, how long can I tell her babies come from a cabbage patch?" Scully looked at her oddly.

"My mom told me that," she said remembering the child doll she used to have; it was a Cabbage Patch Kid.

"Not much longer. Pretty soon the schools will be teaching them."

"Oh dear God, I fear the day she comes home from school with questions. School twists everything and I don't want her to be confused." Amy said, worry in her voice.

"I remember the day my little brother, Charlie came home from school after learning about sex. He couldn't sleep for a week." She laughed lightly of the image of her brother wearing two pairs of boxers to bed for that two weeks.

Mulder chose that moment to walk in the room and looked from Scully to Amy before sitting the seat between the two of them.

"What's the topic of conversation?" he asked feigning interest.

"This morning," Scully said casually.

"I'm gone," he said getting up embarrassed. Amy laughed lightly while Scully giggled watching him leave the kitchen.

"At least I know how to get rid of him when I want." Scully commented, getting a nod from Amy.

Later on that night, after Amy and Lila had left. Will sat at the table eating the spaghetti his mom had made while his parents ate and talked over things that needed to be done before Will's school play at the end of the month. Mulder nodded as Scully went down a mental checklist on what they would need for Will's costume.

"Mom? Dad?" Will called softly pulling their attention towards him.

"Yeah, Buddy?" Mulder said looking to his son while Scully turned to face him.

"Where do babies come from?" he asked looking to them lost. Scully started coughing due to the fact that at that moment she had taken a bite of her food and was caught off guard.

"What?" Mulder asked patting Scully on the back to be sure she was ok.

"Where do babies come from?" he asked again, a little more confident.

"Well, it's complicated," Mulder said unsure what to tell him.

"How complicated?" he asked unsatisfied with that answer.

"They come from the stork," Mulder said, trying to get back to his meal.

"I'm a bird?" he asked, disbelief riddled his voice.

"He had to be like you," Mulder whispered turning to Scully who sat there watching the exchange. She smiled softly, somewhat amused at that statement.

"The cabbage patch!" Scully spat out.

"So I'm a vegetable?"

It came out veggie-table. Again skeptic ruled his voice.

"No," Scully said, upset she too had failed.

"Then, where do they come from?"

Scully looked to Mulder and gave him a look. They both knew they were beat, this was one thing he wasn't going to let down.

"They come from inside their mommy's tummy."

"NAW UH." He argued as if he knew the answer.

"Yes huh," Mulder shot back and Will submitted knowing this was true because his parents stuck to their story.

"How do they get in there?"

"Well you see…" Mulder stated out, already dreading the conversation. "When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much…"

"And decide they want a baby," Scully put in.

"They take off their clothes…" Mulder continued.

"Like when you and mommy were wrestling?" Will asked not really believing what he was hearing.

"Exactly," Scully said looking at him. "Like when daddy and me were wrestling."

"Only it's not called wrestling," Mulder said ashamed he lied to his son.

"What's it called?"

"Sex," Scully said casually being comfortable with the word.

"Oh, and then what?"

"Well…" He was lost.

"They have sex and the daddy leaves a sort of fish inside of the mommy," Scully picked up.

"A fish?" William said giggling.

"Yup, a fish. And the fish finds the mommy's egg and makes a home in there."

"Mommy's have eggs?" He looked at her, his eyes wide.

"Yeah," Scully said a little injured by the fact that the only few ova Mulder had found were gone or unviable and she only had one small child to show for all her pain and struggle. But she loved him more than life itself.

"So once the fish has made its home in the mommy's egg, it starts to grow," Mulder continued seeing how hurt Scully looked.

"Right, it grows and takes certain things from the fish and the egg."

"Like what?"

"Well for you, your fish took your dad's hair, my eyes, your dad's smile, my nose."

"Thank God." She heard Mulder whisper.

"So things that make me look like you?" he asked.

"Right, they're called traits." Mulder looked at her funny, as if to question an English lesson she was giving.

"And the fish and egg work together to make a small baby inside the mommy's tummy. It stays there for nine months growing and getting strong till it looks like a baby." Scully finished.

"How does the baby get out?"

"The mommy pushes it out," Mulder answered.

"How does she push it out? How did the fish get to the egg?"

Mulder and Scully look to each other and tell him all about where the baby came out from and how the sperm entered the woman, once they were finished Will looked at them awkwardly.

"So I came from there." he asked pointing to his mother's stomach.

"Yes," Scully said.

"That's gross," he said.

"It may be gross, but it's true, Buddy."

There was silence at the table as Will ate his lukewarm dinner thinking things over. Sensing the silence, Mulder and Scully went back to eating.

"You ok, Bud?" Mulder asked noticing he had taken to picking his food. He nodded his head.

"It's kinda cool," he whispered.

"What?" Scully asked not hearing him.

"It's kinda cool," he repeated louder.

"How so?" Mulder asked.

"I'm the only one that has heard mommy's heart from the inside," he said smiling.

"Yeah, I guess you have. You're pretty luck Will," Mulder said ruffling his hair as he got up.

"So when you were wrestling..." He looked to his dad. "…were you trying to make another baby?"

"No," Scully said shaking her head.

"Then why were you doing it?"

"Sometimes mommy's and daddy's do it for fun," Mulder answered.

"I don't get it."

"That I will explain to you when you are older. Haven't you asked enough questions?" Mulder asked picking Will up in his arms and holding him over his shoulder while tickling him. The young boy laughed while trying to push his dad away. Scully got up and put the dishes in the sink as she watched them, laughing as well.

"It's good there won't be another baby," Will said smiling.

"Oh, yeah? And why's that?" Mulder asked.

"Because I like being your only baby," he said taking off to his room as soon as his feet hit the floor.

"Here that Scully?" Mulder asked walking over to her. "He likes being an only child." He whispered taking the dishes out of her hand and placed it in the soapy water.

"Yeah, I heard him," she said looking up to him smiling, tears rested in her eyes as others stained her face. He knew that was all she needed to hear, they had just recently given up on trying to have another baby and Scully had felt saddened when Amy had announced her pregnancy. But after what Will had just said she knew that giving up just this once wasn't all bad. She had her son, healthy and alive and she had Mulder, who would never leave her. She smiled, happy with her life as Mulder helped her do the dishes.

The End

I have a question…how many people want to see Mulder and Scully married? Or is everyone ok with the set up they got going on? Leave your comment and I'll see what I can do.

I would like to dedicate this story to my friend GillianDana without her this story would have sucked. I also want to dedicate this story to my grandma, when I asked where babies came from, my parents want to tell me, it was my grandma who told me they came from a cabbage patch.

If you visit my profile page you will see I have about another 5 stories in the monster series, so thanks to reviews it will continue. YAY! Please leave comments on what you guys think and ideas, I love ideas, they may make it into future monster stories. And please review, it's you guys who say whether or not there is more.

Thanks :)

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